Monday, October 5, 2009

tanya sama pokok

are u frustrated with ur own behaviour?

met some frens yesterday
while we were bz dining, this girl started crying....i think she was uncomfortable
she was only 7 months old..
the mother said "sabarla...ibu tgh makan..." but then she totally ignored the baby's cries and continued talking about her trip to *****..excited kot.i dont blame her...
but then the father started gripping her arms so hard and kept saying " **** ni..tak habis2 buat perangai .. senyap boleh tak "

result ? of course the girl's cries became louder..and this time..she couldnt be stopped
the mother turned to us n said " **** ni memang...baran sikit...tension betol..nangis je tak sudah2...sakit ati kdg2!"

what should i do as her parent's friends?

well...if i try to console her...nnti dia kata nak mengajar dia pulak...

so i just smiled and hugged rafiq so hard...because i cant help it...i wanted to cry too...

believe me...ive been through the phase where i felt so tired, so out of breath, i just wanted to be with my own self for a while...but I couldnt..because of Rafiq..

the first few weeks after Rafiq's birth was sooo hard...at times i became so frustrated with myself..why oh why do u have to cry all the time?
did i do anything wrong? are you cold? are u hot? or do u just hate me?
im soooo thankful that hubby dearie was sooo patient with me and Rafiq..
he was the one who sung him to sleep, who learned how to bath him, pump my BM, feed him and change him..

but then...when i finally realized..he needs me, my attention, my love....i began to enjoy every moment.
and Rafiq changed...he did...he became an easy child
provided i always remind him every time i bathe him or massage him that he is a good boy, he is a clever boy and he will always make me proud..


sure at time he has been difficult esp when hes sleepy and uncomfortable..
who isnt right?
but i know i have the power to soothe him
even papa's strong arms are quite less usefull nowadays..



see...doesnt his cries make u want to cry too???not youlah...me...hehehehhe



ive seen many occasions where mommies or daddies scold their presious ones ( even worse babies ) for their lost of patience...
although these small beings are immature in ranges of areas but they can sense our emotions..
dont bother hiding them...our body language says it all...
the closest example is my aunt..she scolds and hits her kids from when they were born. well its not exactly torture but...pinching their arms so hard or pulling their ears..whenever the boys want something. they're very rebellious boys now..they'll scream and embarress their parents in public..

i know i dont have to power to control every behaviour..
but im trying my best..
i know i can..
and it all starts with us...me and hubby dearie..

we vow to :

* always tell rafiq the good and bad of everything..eventhough he still doesnt understand a thing
* always keep him away from bad influences...whether its talking about other ppl, poor hygiene, horrifying tv shows ( eg wrestling ) or even small fights between us , luckily thank god..every misunderstanding end with laughter..heheheh
* always encourage him to try lots of new stuff...even if it means...mama has to clean the house every hour..
* always let him know that we are sooo proud of him and that we love him so much...

i know we are far from perfect but we want to learn. who wants a difficult child kan?
i pray every day that Rafiq will be much easier as he grows..
but though he turns out otherwise, we'll pray so hard that he will change..
and love is all we will be giving him

so the next time...you or ME...decided to loose it..

ask urself..

is it totally necessary ?

afterall...

they are what we taught them to be !

ps : ini bukan entry perasan ye...i cant shake the image out of my head so i have to blog about it...

14 comments:

Lina said...

i really get what u mean.. i too sometimes loose my temper n feel so frustrated when my baby continues crying and i did everything i could think of to make her stop. i am so thankful to have a husband that understands, and shares the responsibilities to care for our child. parenting is not easy but i vow to learn and be good at it day by day.. reading ur post makes me think of my baby now.. (sobs)

Unknown said...

betul tu lina.when we are sooo tired sometimes we tend to loose it.but always remember...they watch and learn.i too always have to remind myself...

Misbehave said...

bak kata pepatah, lain padang, lain belalang.huhu..

ummi said...

betolla sarah...parenting mmg sgt susah....tp,atas usaha kite nk mencorak anak2....bgs entry u....mmg remind diri sndr as for me mommy-to-be...

Cikpid said...

sy adalah bad tempered..but tulaa..Allah jdkan kite spsg..yg berlainan kriteria..my husband sgt la pnyabar..when i loose temper..msti husband i akan take turn jaga Afieq..

sbb kalo mrh baby pon bukan die paham ag..hehehe..

n shouting at the baby i rase mmg xde gune..die ag takut adalaa..

Edge Azwan said...

nice one! ;)

Unknown said...

misbehave : that is soo true..kena remind ourselves all the time

mas : thanks a lot...mmg susah.kdg2 rasa mcm nak give up.tapi bila tgk balik...kita lah yg kena berusaha

cikpid : i pon bila seharian jaga rafiq dah sgt penat kdg2 rasa nak marah.tp hubby mmg sgt penyabar..dia yg amik..but now, bila tgk perangai rafiq semakin baik..jadi semakin sabar...hehehhee

edge : ehehhe/..thanks

Zezzatty said...

ini kenyataan.btol apa yg u tulis tu.

I everytime i keluar,masa tgh siap2kan rayna mesti i pesan kat dia jgn malukan mama..jgn merengek2 xtentu psal..etc etc..

kita je rasa baby tak phm,but dorg phm sbnarnye.

tp standard la nama pon baby.kalau lapar ke,poo poo ke..nangis or merengek2 tu je la cara diaorg nak bgtau kita kan :-)

Unknown said...

betul tu zatty...normal la baby nangis...nak buat macamana.itu je their medium of communication....kena byk sabar...love the way u talk to rayna...sweet

Ada Dalina said...

kesiannya that bb...
sometime in this case we must to be more patient dgn perangai anak2..
nak2 di dpn org kan...

apapon, byk lg cara lain yg bleh kita pujuk selain marah2 atau touch them cam tu...

apalah budak sebesar itu pahamkan dgn kemarahan kita melainkan kehendak dia kita penuhi...

Unknown said...

ada : betullah dear...kdg2 mmg kita pun nak marah.esp bila dia xdgr ckp...kena selalu ingatkan diri sendiri supaya bersabar.........

Elyn Sani said...

salam ziarah.... ur baby pun cute le sgt... windu zaman wafiq kecik dulu!!

Mek Rose said...

salam singgah
terbang dari blog rinie..hehe

ape2 pon..nice post

sabar jela parent tu..budak tu bkn paham ape pon duk marah2 camtu

opps..kebetulan..nama anak kita sama..:-)

Farah said...

huhu..syiannye budak tu..dahla baby lg..ai suka babap (pukul2 manja) peha afif haha geram..tp jadi parent ni mmg kena byk2 bersabar..

nuffnang