ramadhan+merajuk

esok dah puasa...mlm ni siapa nk tlg babysit rafiq?
nk pg solat tarawikh hihihi!
hubby dearie said gilir2...if tonite dia, esok i can go...alamak...xbestnye,tp bolehla dr xpg lngsung
im gonna my very best to fast..i know it'll be sooo hard.
sedangkan xpuasa pun lemah every time lepas BF..
but i will try.
i have to.
last year's puasa pn belum habis ganti lg..
that time, i was still very weak..morning sickness(mind u it happens all day ok)yg sgt teruk...aiyaaa
i only managed to fast for a day last week
itupon seksa nyaaaaaaa

btw, yesterday hubby dearie came back early since i had to meet my gud fren to talk about the coming stock...
(supply raya mau sampai people)
dont forget to visit www.magicmagneticjr.blogspot.com ya
i left rafiq (for the first time) for more than 4 hours
and when they came to pick me up
and this is what i saw
waiting for me in the car...
no sound , no smile...


alaaaaaaa................

hubby dearie said 3 hour3 after i left,
dia dok tgk2 pintu from the living room ( elok lg dok main on his playmat gym)
and then bila hbby dearie nk pg solat
dia start
he cried yg kuat sgt tu...bagi susu dia tolak guna lidah
dukung pun nangis
usually he'll stop as soon as we pick him up
pasang sesame street mengamuk
bagi toys dia baling ( aik? dah pandai ke? )
hubby dearie gave him my baju amik dlm laundry basket.( yg belum basuh tu..tak busuk ke sayang? ) dia main 2 dgn baju tu..xtaula sbb ada my bau or sbb dia ni mmg suka main kain

rasa2 his forehead mcm panas
amik temperature..
37.5 aik?
demam?

dia pun solat, baca ayat qursi to rafiq ( dia takut rafiq kena kacau )
bawak him to pick me up n nk terus pg clinic
yg peliknya, cik abg saya ni xde pulak call bgtau
maybe he doesnt want me to question his capabilities kot hihihi
sbb b4 i left i told him, ill bring rafiq along
dia ckp "takpe.....ill manage, rafiq gud boy kan? "
masa tu si tonet tu mmg la gelak2 ingat i nk bwk dia jln kot sbb dh siap2 pakai tudung
kecian anak mama

i terkejut tgk hubby dearie letak bye bye fever tu on his forehead
"kenapa ni syg?rafiq demam ke?"
"tah tiba2 je dia nangis2 tgk temperature 37.5, jomlah bwk dia jumpa dr chia"
i pegang2 his hands
dia senyap je tgk his lamaze toy gantung kt atas tu
"rafiq sakit ke syg?meh sini mama angkat"
he then continued playing with his hands
"lapar ke?nak susu?"
senyap lg
usually dia alih kepala to my chest
me dh risau dah sgt2 time ni
tiba2 dia nangis
teresak2 bukan melalak
hhuuuuuu...huuuuuu....huuuuuu
terus cpt2 BF dia
sambil2 isap tu dia still teresak2

alahaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

kenala pujuk2 dia
usap2 kepala...gosok2 kaki, tgn sume
nyanyi2 kt dia..

rasa bdn dia
"tak panas pun syg?"
so...we decided xjadi pg clinic..
balik rumah tgk his temperature..
ok je...

hubby dearie ckp,
ni kes mama tinggal la ni
tak pernah2 kn kena tinggal
aaaaaaaaaa????????
baru 4 jam rafiq
klo sehari?
mcamana?
ull have to get used to it
u will adapt...although i know it'll be hard i know syg
tp anak mama kn strong
nnti mama baliklah, mama bukan tinggal rafiq selama2nya..

kesian dia...
that night dia bergayut for 3 hours
xpelah....mama bg chance hihihiih
this morning dia nangis je nk susu
xde borak xde gelak2
usually pg2 dia la yg plg becok
ni senyap je
then main tgn balik
i told him...
"syg mama mrh mama ke?mama sorry k....rafiq big boy kan...jgnla merajuk2 ye syg"
dia senyap jugak..he looked at me blankly
sayanggggggggggg,
kenapa ni
i felt like crying...takut k...

then
lepas mandikan dia,
mcm biasa lah rutin massage his whole body
then when i started to sing his fave song

i love u, u love me,we're happy family,
with a great big hug and a kiss from me to u,
wont u say u love me too...

tiba2 dia senyum
then gelak2
then borak2 and pusing kiri kanan mcm biasa..
i was soooooooooooo happppyyy
bahagia...

syg mama traume ke?
jgnla takutkan mama lg ye..
anak mama big boy xnak la merajuk2 lg k
mama syg la..bukan mama tinggal rafiq..

im glad hes back to his usual self
but i know ill have to leave him again in the future...
lets just hope he understands now, mama will be back,
this is just temporary

oklah everyone
selamat berpuasa...
semoga bulan Ramadhan yg mulia ni mendatangkan byk kebaikan untuk kita semua
minta maaf klo ada slh silap mana tau terblog yg menyakitkan hati
afterall

yg buruk itu dtgnya drpd kita dan yg baik itu semuanya dr Allah SWT.

ps : semoga semua momma's bertenaga untuk berpuasa dgn jayanya walaupun sibuk bekerja, menjaga anak dan menyusu hhihihii. applies mostly to me..AMIN!!